Well, it varies from person to person whether this is a truly important question in their life or not. For those with a ‘growth mindset,’ it is indeed crucial. There are several definitions of the ‘ego’. My observations lead me to this understanding: The ego serves as our internal driving force, suggesting that acceptance by others is dependent on our ability to be/act/look, etc., in a specific way aligned with their expectations. It functions as an internal judgmental system, urging conformity to gain positive feedback, fostering a sense of acceptance and love. This process occurs during early childhood when our self-image begins to shape up. Children are rapid learners and absorb the impulses of their surroundings through sensory learning, make sense of the world they live-in without direct instructions. Children don’t do or not do something because they are told to. They simply gain the understanding by experience that going against the will of the adults world ends up in negative feedback, resulting in discomfort. After such experiences, they realize it is better to watch out for what the world wants to stay in the realm of positive feedback. This is the phase when we take in the understanding that we cannot be accepted as we are. The birth of the idea of “I am not enough.” This thought embeds itself in our psyche (in the form of a subtle feeling) and takes the lead over our actions. We all want to be loved, accepted, and to belong. This is our basic nature. Yet, what happens when we unknowingly embed this belief as part of our identity? It alters our decision-making process ans shapes our lives — impacting what we dare to do, think, feel, and act. The longer we act from this belief, the deeper our identification becomes with it. And what is the impact ? It pushes us away from the situations/people/etc. which has significant values for us and keeping us instead on the loop of choosing situations inside of our comfort zone — were our ego can’t get hurt. The ego drives us away from our deeper layers, where anything that is valuable to us, exist. This is the birth of an empty life without contentment. So if you wish to make your life worthy of living, it is definitely important to understand what the ego is and recognise it in action unless you will stay in the in-between state of self-doubt without the clarity what are the actions that leads towards your own internal content and what are the ones that are about compulsion.
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